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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28666854">To Die Like a Hero Coming Home</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyoromii/pseuds/kyoromii'>kyoromii</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Doomsday but sideways [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Anarchist TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Angst, Emotional Manipulation, Everybody is only really mentioned except Tommy Techno and Tubbo, Gen, Hopeful Ending, Hurt Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt Toby Smith | Tubbo, Hurt TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Implied/Referenced Character Death, Mentioned Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Wilbur Soot, No shipping, Platonic Relationships, Protective Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Protective Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Self-Sacrifice, Self-Worth Issues, Swearing, TommyInnit-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Traitor TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Unreliable Narrator, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, because OF COURSE THERE IS, kind of?, no beta we die like lmanberg, thats weirdchamp, though its only referenced</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-20 12:33:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,508</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28666854</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyoromii/pseuds/kyoromii</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>TommyInnit is often honest to a fault, but today, he lies.</p><p>or</p><p>AU where Tommy still 'betrays' Technoblade, but not for the reasons he thinks. Tommy knows Lmanberg is a lost cause, but he'll be damned if anyone gets caught in the crossfire</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Technoblade &amp; Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit, TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot &amp; Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Doomsday but sideways [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2146989</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>720</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>To Die Like a Hero Coming Home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hullo- this is my first fic ever hope yall enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>Tommy feels sick. </p><p>A crashing wave of dread fueled nausea settling in the pit of his stomach, weighing down his body as he stares down Tubbo-Tubbo, whose eyes glared at him with indignation; anger, confusion, and <em> fear </em>filling his orbs. Tommy couldn’t believe he was here, standing in the middle of what used to be the community house, completely surrounded by heavily armed people who thought he did it. And as dozens of eyes watched him with scrutiny, tommy thinks that, in retrospect, he probably shouldn’t have revealed himself like this. Regret begins to simmer in the back of his mind, the beating of his heart getting louder and louder as anxiety crawls up his skin, tracing the veins in his arms as he clutches his weapons tightly- but as soon as it had come, it passes.</p><p>Not entirely of course. </p><p>His eyes still lock with Tubbo’s, Tommy vaguely aware of the people watching them. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (They’re watching me, just like-) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He stands tall, just as angry and confused and <em> afraid </em> as Tubbo so clearly was, but unwilling to back down. The only difference now was that he pushed the regret that ebbed away at his courage aside for another day, knowing deep down that even if he could go back in time before this, before he jumped to his own defense while under threat of practically an army of people <em> plus </em> dream, he would do it again. <em> (like the stupid fucking idiot he is) </em></p><p> </p><p>In any other situation he would laugh at the stupidity of his actions, it was like he had a <em> death wish </em> or something.</p><p>
  <em> (‘Maybe’ he thinks, ‘Maybe I do’) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Tommy succeeds in toning down his regrets for now, but he fails to keep his fury in check. He can feel it in his hands as his grip turns white, in his teeth as his jaw clenches almost painfully, and in his eyes as angry tears burn into the back of his brain, hissing like a lit stick of TNT. Its a fury he's never felt before, only comparable to when he lost everything to L’manberg the first two times but not nearly the same. Because while he was no stranger to rage, this felt different. For every time he’s felt this way there was always an overarching theme of <em> grief </em> , of <em> loss, </em> but also hope. A naive sliver hope to keep a dream alive. A dream that was ultimately just a dream, and as fabricated as they intrinsically were. However, <em> this </em> fury was enlightened, resigned almost, but most of all it was reflective. The hope was still there, of course, buried deep but not disposed of;  forming the foundation of the methodical fire that burned within the boy, a fire that crackled and grew with every breath that left his lips. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Note that this hope is different-  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Unlike the hope that clung to the past, latched onto the country that was truly nothing but a poltergeist taking the form of a place he once lovingly called home- No, this hope is for something new, for something different. And L’manberg would never be different. Its flags may burn and become new, its name may change and seem different, but it will always take more than it gives. It will always twist your love for the people in it for the country itself, turn you into a doting devotee hungry for validation and power from a land that eats the people that live in it. It has corrupted and destroyed time and time again, consuming Schlatt, consuming Wilbur, consuming <em> Tubbo-  </em> but this time it’ll be different, Tommy thinks, because it’ll be <em> fucking dead. </em></p><p> </p><p>So he seethes with purpose, embracing a fury built by every threat, every pointless death, every <em> stupid fucking sacrifice </em> he made for this blood soaked piece of shit he had called ‘home’. A fury fueled by this plague of a nation that was more death trap than country, fueled by all the bits of his childhood he had lost as he built it, and fueled by every single betrayal that Tommy never ever saw coming, even when he should have-</p><p> </p><p>(<em> Because when it came down to it, Tommy </em> <b> <em>was</em> </b> <em> always too trusting, too loyal, and... in spite of the obnoxious-rowdy-selfish front he always put up, too kind.  </em></p><p>
  <em> In this brief moment he begins to understand his piglin warrior brother a little bit more, and the ache in Tommy’s chest is no longer just for himself as the unfamiliar caress of guilt wraps around his throat.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>- And most of all, this fury was fueled by every day, hour, minute, and <em>fucking </em> second he spent <em> alone </em> with nothing but the ocean and its graveyard while dream tried to slice him up with puppet strings. He remembers the ocean, how it would look absolutely ethereal in his darkest moments- because who needed sirens when the water itself sung to you oh so temptingly? </p><p>He remembers knowing that there must be thousands if not millions of remains at the bottom of the ocean floor, skeletal or otherwise, and he remembers considering joining them at the bottom if it meant he would be a little bit less alone.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn’t realize he’s yelling. He’s barely comprehensible as he argues with Tubbo, who looked like he didn’t know if he was arguing as a president or as Tommy’s best friend, purpose lost as they fought like children. </p><p> </p><p><em> (They </em> <b> <em>are </em> </b> <em> children, Tommy notes, but they both know they lost their right to be a long time ago.) </em></p><p> </p><p>Both boys scream of betrayal, distrust clinging to their bones even when they’re faced with the one thing they’ve continually longed for in this shithole, each other. The blonde spitfire tries desperately to convince them he didn’t do this, the accusations slurring his words and thoughts as his pleas fell on deaf ears. Even as Technoblade speaks up, articulating what Tommy could not and vouching for his innocence, nobody believes him. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (Of course they don’t, he was always nothing but a liar and a liability.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The yelling continues as chaos stirs, and suddenly, he remembers that his disc hangs in the balance- <em>  and Tommy finds that he doesn’t care- </em> but he can't fathom that. How <em> could </em>he have stopped caring? So as denial hits him like a freight train he begs, he pleads, he fights. </p><p>It is futile. </p><p>He is helpless, and Tommy feels like he's in the final control room all over again, like he's back in Pogtopia where all he could do is watch as Wilbur- as his <em> brother </em> quickly lost himself for a nation that ultimately didn’t deserve him, like he's back by the remains of Manberg, where his father mercy kills one of his brothers and his other disowns him then and there. </p><p>He is helpless and he <em> hates it. </em></p><p> </p><p>So he says something he’ll regret later, or now, while tears well up in his eyes and his apparent helplessness crushes him from the inside. And Tommyinnit is honest. He is brash, and he is reckless in his honesty, but he is also genuine. Tommy may scheme sometimes, or dance around the truth, but he is ultimately never a liar. The boy seemed to have no filter ever, telling it how he saw it, and meaning every single thing he ever said. He cared very little for keeping up appearances, cared very little for faking smiles for the sake of civility, and so he always told the truth (or what he saw as the truth), even when it would come back to bite him in the ass. Tommyinnit was honest to a fault, but right now, he lies.</p><p> </p><p>“The discs were worth more than you ever were!”</p><p> </p><p>This isn’t true. He knows this. He screams at himself in his head because why the fuck would he say that? Tubbo was his best friend, and he meant more to him than the discs ever could. Yet Tommy still manages to find himself here, glowering at the boy in front of him as hurt graced his features. Tommy thinks that maybe that’s what he wanted, to see Tubbo as hurt as he was, to make him feel how Tommy had felt when he was exiled-how he felt right now as he’s accused of a crime he didn’t commit. But Tommy knows it's more than that. Although getting back at him was surely part of it, the blonde teen knew that that wasn’t the main reason.</p><p>Looking at Tubbo now, Tommy recognized a change in him. Tommy looked past the tensed shoulders of his ex-best friend and saw a boy, half eaten by the country he was supposed to lead, walking down a path of tyranny on a puppets leash. Tubbo was not the same. Tubbo looked tired, a shell of the energetic, painfully optimistic boy he once was, and Tommy wonders for a moment if he looked the same. He wonders if the others see them for what they are, two carcasses of children lost to war, trying to fill in shoes far too big for them.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (In the shocked silence that lingers in the ruined community house, Tommy promises he will never let what happened to him happen to anyone else ever again.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>What follows is a blur of events, half of the teen’s mind frantically thinking of a way to end this all. The golden haired boy barely recognizes what he’s doing, his body moving on his own, playing the part of a frantic fugitive and fighting with Tubbo as his thoughts raced for a plan.    He knew he couldn’t just save L'manberg, and quite frankly, he didn't want to. He wanted this country burnt to the ground just as much as Technoblade did. The discs didn’t matter, and maybe they once did, but not anymore. He wants this place to be nothing but a crater, but he knows that he can’t let Technoblade do it. As much as he wants this nation gone, he can’t bear to see all the people go down with it. Friend or foe, they didn't deserve to die with L'manberg, but Tommy? He helped make this place, and so he had to be the one to put it down. </p><p>He lost his brother and parts of his best friend to this land, he will not lose anyone else.</p><p>So Tommy, honest in everything he does, lies again.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m with Tubbo.”</p><p> </p><p>He ignores the guilt that seeps into his blood as a look of disbelief shrouds Technoblade’s expression. He tries to dull his senses and focus on <em> anything </em> else as he runs with this godawful, impromptu plan. He doesn’t meet Technoblade’s eyes, and he ignores the smug smile that graces dream’s lips. Tommy knows he’s just hurt Technoblade <em> again </em>, and he feels sick for what seems to be the fifth time within the past 10 minutes because of it. But in the end, he sucks it up, he sucks it up and reminds himself that this is all temporary; a means to an end. The look of betrayal and building hatred from Technoblade, the lingering hurt in Tubbo, the disappointment in him he just knows Phil will feel. They won’t matter, because he will make it up to them even if it’s the last thing he does-</p><p> </p><p>So he keeps lying.<br/>
<br/>
Somehow, within the next couple of hours he is able to convince those on the side of L'manberg to evacuate. Though that isn't exactly how he words it. He tells them they need to prepare elsewhere, that they need all the manpower to get ready for tomorrow. He musters all the charisma he can to convince them to stay on the outskirts of the nation, excusing it with an elaborately worded, but empty plan of a surprise attack. It's a desperate attempt, but eventually they cave. </p><p>
  <em> (He’s shocked by the trust they still show him) </em>
</p><p>He heads into the night, alone, as he prepares for this raggedy plan of his. All Tommy wants is to help, all he wants is for everyone to feel and be at home with one another. He just wanted all the wars to end and for dream to stop fucking around with everybody. Tommy thinks that's all he ever wanted to do, bring people together. He pulled pranks and made crude jokes, clung to people and often acted too close, but ultimately Tommy just wanted that feeling of family. Sometimes he was bad at socializing like a normal human being, but it was clear to anyone who looked close enough that he was just a boy with so much love to give. So yeah, Tommy concluded, he just wants everyone to be friends again. For the most part. Some small part of him wants forgiveness. He knows he’s selfish, he knows he’s loud, he knows he’s..too much. He’s caused so much chaos and grief, and in spite of all the excuses he makes he knows it's inexcusable. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> ( But he’s only 16! A small part of him yells. He should be allowed to fuck up, to be naive, to be wrong. Why is that he has to be taught lessons in grand gestures of violence? Why must he be taught to behave through grief and loss? How come he cannot be corrected rather than to be broken down and rebuilt over and over and ov-) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He knows he should have learnt by now, and that he has paid less than half his life debts. His hands shake as he grips the items in his hand, whether it be from the fatigue and nerves of having to sneak in and out to get them, or the sheer weight of what he was about to do, he didn’t know. All he knew was that for all the shit he’s done, for all the shit he’s gone through, he wasn’t gonna let this bullshit continue. </p><p> </p><p>Technoblade’s old Theseus spiel suddenly comes to Tommy’s mind, and In a moment of Introspection he decides that he’s willing to die a hero’s death if it meant no one else would have to anymore.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>  (In the far reaches of the smp, on one end, one group wanders under questionable orders. They do not know about what’s about to happen and won’t until it's too late. They will only hear before they see. They will be safe, and they will never be fast enough. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> In the middle, a ghost knows there’s something wrong. But his brain is scattered and one can only hope he can piece himself back together in time. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Finally, on the other, a betrayed anarchist ironically dressed as a king will check on his secret base. He will see  the walls almost empty of wither skulls. He will see the looted chests and neatly folded note tucked away in one of them. He will see the axe of peace and he will run back, less prepared than planned but more determined, followed by the steps of a father that can’t fail a son again, and in spite of a ventriloquist with a god-complex.  </em>
</p><p><br/>
<em> And they </em> <b> <em>will </em> </b> <em> be fast enough. They have to be) </em></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Man this arc really hurt me so bad I had to write about it huh? I made a wholeass account to cope</p></blockquote></div></div>
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